Sly’s workout routine on the cave set really got extreme.
FADE IN: EXT. ROCKY (HEH!) MOUNTAINS SYLVESTER STALLONE climbs up a cliff without any ropes. SYLVESTER STALLONE (flexing) Despite my wildly irresponsible antics, I’m actually a mountain rescue bro-fessional! Nearby, JANINE TURNER and RALPH WAITE take a helicopter like normal people. JANINE TURNER Hey Sly, I’m your girlfriend who’ll definitely do more than just support you and get kidnapped. RALPH WAITE And I’m your lovably eccentric old partner. You can count on me making it to the end of this thing! SYLVESTER STALLONE ...sure. SYLVESTER, JANINE, and RALPH find fellow Park Ranger MICHAEL ROOKER and his girlfriend MICHELLE JOYNER stranded on a peak. MICHELLE JOYNER Before you rescue us, let me shoehorn in a quick reference to you being in 'Nam that will completely justify you guys basically being Navy SEALs. SYLVESTER STALLONE You know, I’d love to help, but I need some emotional depth for my redemption arc. So... SYLVESTER DROPS MICHELLE! SYLVESTER STALLONE (winking) You might say she...didn’t have a firm grasp of the situation! Sorry, my dialogue is 90% bad puns. MICHAEL ROOKER I hate you now, Sly! This is all your fault. JANINE TURNER But Michelle didn’t know how to climb and Michael brought her up here in the first place so really -- SYLVESTER STALLONE (blocking ears) La-la-la-la I said DEPTH, dammit. EIGHT MONTHS LATER: INT. DENVER MINT Treasury agent REX LINN meets with his boss BRUCE MCGILL. REX LINN Hi, I'm an asshole. BRUCE MCGILL Noted. Now allow me to discuss our top secret plans in the middle of this crowded lobby. (tweets vault codes) Somehow, terrorists have discovered the details of our transport operations. (live-streams instructions for robbing a plane) It’s anyone’s guess as to how. Anyway, we think supervillain John Lithgow may try to rob you. (holds press conference announcing flight path)